People are so upset about us leaving for California. I know they're going to miss us and it will be a life adjustment for them, but 'Stop thinking about you're freakin' selves!' Look, I understand that I will be missing from their lives and I don't want to hurt anyone, but their losing one person. I am losing not only that person, but every other individual person who is losing the one 'me'. I'm seperating myself from everyone that I love and have had in my life, PLUS carrying the guilt that I'm hurting the people I love, PLUS upheaving my entire life, PLUS worrying about what's going to happen once I get out there. We're not walking on air saying "Yeah, it's almost time to go to California. Things will be great once we're there." ---This is a hard decision and we're making sacrifices to do this, and only a few people in my life are saying, "I'm sad that you're going and I'll miss you, but I'm so happy you're not willing to let your dreams die." Most people are just predicting our inevitable failure. That's so sweet, isn't it? 'I love you, but I can't wait for you to fail miserably, so that I can show you how right I was that you shouldn't have lived your own life.' If you're still living at home or under you parents direction, you have no right to make that call because you have yet to truly live your own life. If you are an independant person with a life you've created based on the decisions that you've made, then you're a hypocrite. What makes you good enough to take a point in your life and become what you make of yourself, but for some reason the person that you supposedly care so much about doesn't have enough worth as a person to be allowed to do the same. If we fail, so what? That's what happens in life: You succeed, you fail, you learn. That's always changing. The only thing that shouldn't change is the love and support of the people you care about. If you're not going to be there for us if we fail, how are you actually here for us at all?

I love the people that I'm going to California with. They're a part of my life. Do I think they have enough experience or appreciation for certain aspects of life to make it without guidance? Probably not. But I believe they have the potential. They're not stupid people, they will learns things they never thought they would and life will probably throw us all for a loop a couple of times, but we'll each be there to pick the other one up when it does. I believe in them enough to close one eye and take a chance with them, and I have no safety net if it fails. I just have me, so I'm taking a bigger chance than anyone. There's no going home to my family, it's not there. Maybe we'll make our future and maybe we won't find it there, but the only way to truly fail is to never try at all. Face it, it's a done deal. It's going to happen. We have to try. You have a short time left to spend with us before we leave, it's up to you what you do with it.