the day's assignments

I got stuck with the job of collating pages for a book last night. For those of you unfamiliar with the term, collating is taking thousands of sheets of paper that are too glossy to be sorted by a machine and putting them into piles, sheet by sheet. Stacks [111] [222] and [333] become [1,2,3] [1,2,3] [1,2,3]. It really sucks.

And it doesn't really require a lot of thought. So I'd grab a stack off the top, wipe my index finger and thumb on a wet sponge, and slowly build 30 or 40 books. About 20 pages per book, plus covers. [You do the math.]

About halfway in, I wasn't even thinking about collating anymore. My mind was wandering so much, that I realized I hadn't thought about collating in twenty minutes.

Buddhists practice the art of awareness. Awareness isn't nirvana or blankness of mind, it's just what it says; plainly, being aware. Mainly of your surroundings. Buddha said that none of us are really ever living in the present, because we're either thinking of the past or the future. What's happened or what's going to happen.

I've been reading up on it for a couple months, and I've got to say being aware is tough. Especially for someone as frazzled as myself. For one thing, I don't think I go five minutes a day without singing a song in my head. I always have at least one tune in my head all day; if not several. And usually I'm singing them, instead of just thinking about it.

I try to be aware of my surroundings. Instead of thinking of everything around me, I look at it and think of nothing. [I guess that's where the blankness, if any, comes into if for me.]

I think the first big step is taking in what's actually physically around you. Most of the time, we're only aware of the things very close to us. For instance, a computer screen. A girlfriend. The television. Try for a moment to imagine yourself in the room you are in, beyond what surrounds you within a foot. Just picture in your head the layout of the room and all the objects and people within it.

Now indulge your mind for a moment and think only of the present. Not what you're going to eat today, or what happened at work yesterday. Just you and the computer screen. Homogeney.

Now think of nothing. Hell, give your mind a rest for a moment or two.

Remember, inner peace is choice. Begin within.